Most teenagers struggle with their identity and finding out who they really are, but most

teenagers do not experience a struggle with their biological identity.

Brittany ‘Mitch’ Keppner, senior and transsexual bisexual youth, was raised female but sophomore year he identified himself as male and is adjusting to his life as a boy.

“I was really thinking about [my gender orientation], and I realized I didn’t want to be a girl, or rather I wasn’t a girl,” Keppner said. “When I figured that out, I started using the nurse’s bathroom and asked my teachers if they could call me Mitch.”

Keppner said he always struggled with his gender identity, despite only definitively deciding his sophomore year.

“When I was younger, I always acted more like a boy,” Keppner said, “and it wasn’t until fourth or fifth grade that I started thinking about who I was. [Because I was a tomboy], I got picked on a lot back then, but I never actually felt like I was a girl.”

Buck Dodson, a lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, questioning (LGBTQ) counselor for the Chicago-based counseling group IntraSpectrum, has seen many youth like Keppner.

“Most of the transgender kids I see tell me they knew something was wrong from a young age,” Dodson said. “Gender identity is a really vague and unreported, but for many of these kids it is a crucial part of their happiness.”

Because of his struggle with gender identity, there was animosity within the home, according to Keppner.

Before Mitch came out as transsexual, his “mom [was] not really accepting of transgender,” Keppner said. “It is kind of hard at home. I wear my bindings so I can look more like a boy, but then my mom tells me to take them off because I will damage the tissue. So she doesn’t really get that I don’t want to be female.”

According to Keppner, when he came out as bisexual, his mother told him he was just going through a phase. Because of this, Keppner has kept his gender-orientation from his mother.

“I told her before [about my bisexuality] and she said, ‘no, you’re just this and that’,” Keppner said. “[My mom] is really opinionated and she [believed] gays, lesbians, and transsexual [orientations are] a choice.”

Jen Jacobeck-Wallack, Mitch’s mother, said that after Mitch came out as a boy, she started learning about transexuality and is more understanding of it.

“What we see physically on the outside doesn’t make up who is on the inside,” Wallack said. “I have tattoos, and for me to say you can’t change who you are on the outside to more match who is on the inside seemed like I was being a hypocrite.”

Half of lesbian and gay youth report parental rejection because of their sexual orientation, according to Youth Pride Inc.’s website, an organization advocating equality for LGBTQ youth.

“People forget how hard it can be for the parents of LGBTQ kids,” Dodson said. “Imagine raising a child with so many hopes for grandkids and stuff like that, only to realize that your child may not have a biological child. When a kid comes out, their parents can go through this shock, and his or her first instinct is to deny or ignore it. Unfortunately, that results in the kids feeling isolated.”

Because of this fear of rejection, Keppner said he attempted to be more like a girl and it didn’t work.

“There was a point where I just wanted to appease my mom, and I just wanted my mom to be happy,” Keppner said. “But at some point, I just figured out that it is my life and I should be able to be whoever I am.”

Mitch and his mother agree many of the family problems have gone away with time.

“She probably won’t admit it,” Keppner said. “But my mom used to be a lot less accepting of me and transgender when I first came out. I think she understands more now.”

Dodson believes students should not try to be someone they are not.

“It is really dangerous to someone’s emotional health to attempt to be something they are not,” Dodson said. “All they are doing is creating pent up emotions which they are not sharing.”

According to Keppner, when he came out, his brother attempted to explain to their family why his gender orientation is not a choice.

“Sometimes when my stepdad gets on my case about my orientation, my older brother tries to explain to him how I don’t really have a choice in the matter,” Keppner said.

Despite his father not understanding, Keppner had conversations about hormone therapy with his parents. He wants to start as soon as he can.

“We need to talk to a doctor about the risks,” Wallack said. “I can support Mitch, but if a medical professional says it’s not a good idea, I don’t think we should start. When a doctor tells me it’s the right time to do that, then I think we should continue.”

Despite their disagreements, Wallack states Keppner’s coming out strengthened their relationship.

“I think I relate more to Mitch now,” Wallack said. “Before, Mitch was always hiding himself to me, which is where a lot of the problems might have stemmed from. I feel like he will come talk to me about his problems now.”

While Wallack has become closer to her child since the initial coming out, Dodson said many parents just need time to accept their child’s identity.

“Most parents will eventually get their kid’s [sexual and gender] identity,” Dodson said. “But until that time, I think students should try and find a group where they can express themselves. The GSA (Gay Straight Alliance) movement has really helped with that.”

Keppner said the LZHS GSA and his friends have helped him stay motivated during his parents’ discontent, becoming more involved near the end of his senior year.

“Being in GSA and going to things like their dances helps a lot,” Keppner said. “You meet people and it makes you feel less alone.”

Keppner took more responsibilities in GSA’s the Day of Silence dance held at LZHS on April 19. He says he is really excited about the honor.

“When [the GSA], wanted me to help lead the dance, I was really honored,” Keppner said. “I do not consider myself a leader, but I feel this opportunity is helping me get out there.”